I wasn't really into getting poked and prodded and stuck this morning for some reason. I know that this process only happens once every three months, but I don't look forward to it. But then, I don't have any choice - I'm a cancer patient.
So we go off to see the urologist even when the juice to cope is low and we're not up to being one of the gazillion members of The Brotherhood That No One Wants To Be a Member Of that are stuffed in a small room at Brigham and Womens' Hospital. And we wait. And wait. Appointments times come and go so easily that you wonder if it wouldn't just be more efficient to do the "take a number" method.
That's until it's our turn to see the doctor and then things go very, very fast - he looks at the file, he tells you what he thinks of the last round of tests, he does an exam, and you're out the door and off to get your blood drawn. Lickity split. And in 48 hours you find out the magic number upon which the your future hangs. I assume that if the number is bad, then the doc gives you a call. If I'm not lucky, I'll find out.
You would think that after 2 years of this, it would be old hat. But, no, I haven't seemed to have lost the stomach churn or the feeling of being a rat caught in some sort of cross between a maze and a chess match. I don't like this, but I have no choice - I'm a cancer patient and the alternative is to step off of the medical map and into totally uncharted territory. I understand why people would do this. The medical system can breed such distrust that people will gamble with their lives to get away from it. It drives people to travel to clinics in Mexico, to order packets of unidentifiable herbals from the internet, or to adopt strange diets based on untested theories.
Why do people do this? Because the current American health care is organized in such a way that it is increasingly difficult to come to the conclusion that the system gives a damn about the people that it is allegedly designed to serve. People spend billions of their own dollars in "complementary" therapies for no other reason that they want someone to work with them on their health that they trust and that they think actually give a damn about their health. This is not even addressed in standard medical settings except by those who really care about the people that they serve - and they're pretty much being eaten alive by their participation in the machine.
You hear a lot about how the American health care system is broken because it costs too much money and that is true, but you don't hear too much about the real problem - it has no heart anymore. Those of us who are at our weakest are being cared for by a giant machine that no longer has anyone at the controls - at least no one who cares about us. We've all become widgets in the "industry" of health care. That's great for MBA's but not for all of us - at least until the MBA's get sick.
Comments